Internal conflict, unmet interpersonal needs, and external behavior can all have a significant impact on a leader’s ability to be congruent, value self-awareness, and establish personal connections with others.
Internal Conflict
Internal conflict can arise when a leader’s personal values, beliefs, and behaviors are in conflict with each other. For example, a leader who values honesty and transparency but also has a tendency to avoid conflict may experience internal conflict when they need to address a difficult situation with a team member. This internal conflict can lead to inconsistency in behavior and undermine the leader’s credibility and trustworthiness.
Interpersonal Needs
Unmet interpersonal needs can also have a significant impact on a leader’s ability to establish personal connections with others. For example, if a leader has a strong need for control and micromanages their team, it can create a sense of distrust and resentment among team members. This can undermine the leader’s ability to build a strong, collaborative team and limit their effectiveness as a leader.
The Impact of Internal Conflict & Unmet Needs
These internal issues culminate in external behaviors which can have a significant impact on a leader’s ability to be congruent and establish personal connections with others. For example, a leader who talks about the importance of work-life balance but regularly works long hours and sends late-night emails may create a sense of hypocrisy and erode their team’s trust in their leadership.
To be a congruent leader who values self-awareness and personal connection, it is essential to address any internal conflict, unmet interpersonal needs, and inconsistent external behavior. This may involve working with a coach or therapist to explore and address any underlying issues and developing self-awareness and emotional intelligence to better understand oneself and others. It may also involve setting clear boundaries, communicating openly and honestly with team members, and demonstrating consistent behavior that aligns with personal values and beliefs. By doing so, a leader can build trust, establish stronger personal connections with others, and become a more effective and authentic leader.
